Week 33 of 1995
Dear Allison, I have this problem that all of my fartsare really loud. I am never able to get away with apoot in public. Unlike my friends who can pretendthat the offending odor was someone else, I amfingered immediately and I am beginning to getfed up. Do you have any secret fart techniquesthat you could reveal? It seems women never fart.How do they do it, 'cause, let's face it, we'll allgotta let go every once in a while?
Signed, Stinky
Allison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
I have what most would consider a great job -- I amactually employed in New Media and earning prettygood cash. My problem centers around the fact thatI hate every stinking minute of my work and wouldprefer to be doing my own thing (bizness) but others(parents, friends, etc...) are pressuring me to keepit - its rough out there in the real world (i recentlygraduated). How do I blow these jokers off withoutpissing them off and gracefully transition to thetough schlog of doing what I would like to do.
Signed, just another whiny kidAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Although this is an unlikely forum for me, I thought that it might be interesting to get your take. I am 49, divorced 5 years ago, and am mostly bringing up my 10 year old boy. Having gone through a few rather stressful relationships since that time, I recently found myself almost happily on my own (i.e. sans female). I had recently advertised for a part time assistant in my business and was pleased to find a younger woman (29) who was highly qualified and looking for just such a position. Well, to make a long story short, within a month or so we had become very much involved. I am quite thrilled over the turn of events and we both agreed that it would be better if she didn't continue to work for me in the interest of business and pleasure don't mix. So, my question to you, is simply do you have any suggestions for two people who have fallen very much in love and are twenty years apart?
Signed, anonymousAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Why is the American Pint only 16 fluid ounces andthe Imperial Pint 20 fluid ounces?
Signed, ParchedAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Dear Allison,Can a satisfying, even superior sex life be created entirely through lucid-dreaming techniques?
Signed, Lotus-eaterAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
My friend is on the edge of a divorce due to a lack of communication with his wife. His wife says that he should see a counselor, but he will only go if she joins him (but she refuses).He thinks she's messing around, but is not concerned much by it (he has messed around too).What should he do? Can/Should this marriage be saved?
Signed, DarkmanAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Dear Allison, See, there's this girl. Well, there are a lot of girls.But my question relates to one in particular.I am highly enamored of this individual, harboring distinctromantic longings for her. She thinks well of me, too,but it's a more respectful, platonic, Nice-Guy, "just-friends" affection. At this point in her life, she's only interestedin pursuing empty sex and mind games with silly gigolos.(I'm not being judgemental, those are her words. Well, not thesilly gigolos part, but the rest.) Anyhow, what I wantto know is this: Is it ever possible for respectful affectionto translate into hot, slavering lust? If it is, what can I do to facilitate this transformation?
Signed, Mr. Re-fucking-spectableAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Will people ever stop being so stupid?
Signed, Off The LipAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Dear Allison,I am in a life dilemma! I am 29 years old. I was separatedfrom my wife 2 years ago, and have been divorced for about 5months. I am also somewhat Bisexual. The trouble is I don'tlike being bisexual. I like women a lot better. Unfortunately,I can't seem to suppress the other urges though. I feel that ifI continue my bisexual behaviour, I will end up either riddled witha terrible disease or I will be eternally lonely -- not being ableto make up my mind on not only "Who to love", but "What to love".Can you help me?
Signed, Lonely and ConfusedAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Allison,I just met this woman after shedding tears in my beer (cause my darlin aint here)over the woman who left me six months ago. Is it OK to jump in the sackwith this new person, whom I feel i might be falling in love with and I know isinterested in me, or should I keep mourning for a few more months? The ex nowexpects me to be her best friend, or something. Basically, it's confusing. You women!You sure know how to drive a guy nuts.
Signed, Joshua in ParisAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Dear Allison,For the last three months I have been having a torrid Internet and telephone-mediated romance withan almost-unbelievably sympathetic young man I met on a MUD. He's flying out from LAX in three weekstime to meet me. I'm absolutely scared to death.What if he turns out to be a rabid psychotic axe-murderer, or worse than that, really ugly (maybe thecute photos were faked)? Or what if he turns out to be as wonderful as I think he is, and I end up living in the middle of an earthquake zone, raising dozensof baby Americans who insist on calling me 'Mom'?Am I deluding myself? Do Internet romances ever work?
Signed, Anguished in AustraliaAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Dear Allison,I was just dumped by my lover of six months and he wants to remain friends. However, he dumped me over the phone, while I was at work, the day before our planned six month anniversary celebration and it was for another woman who already has a boyfriend. My question is: was it wrong of me to tell him I could never be friends with him ( and to fuck off ) or was I being too harsh?
Signed, trying hard not to be bitterAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Alison,What's the deal with engagement party's? Do I takea gift, and what would be an appropriate gift?Thanks!
Signed, Confused in Chicago???Allison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
Do you feel that the web is ultimately bringing us together, or luring us into isolation?Will the eyes of love and friendship merely flicker through dispassionate monitors, will our hands only caress so many worn and waiting keys, or will this unique medium allow us to transcend our preconceptions of intimacy?
Signed, so close but yet so far, KenwiAllison hasn't answered this question. But you can.
